Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Boundaries ?

I remember the first time I was confronted with the concept of boundaries.

I didn't understand what this word meant in my turbulent life because my personal boundaries were frequently invaded throughout my childhood and teen years.

I was called, "The Seductress" by a therapist and wanted to attack him in protest !

I didn't know that I was seducing or being seduced by people. This was my unconscious, conditioned modus operandi.

Years later I recognize the tremendous healing in this aspect of my life. I no longer have the desire to seduce or be seduced by anyone.

Now I am working on my need to seek approval.

To please or not to please . . .

Boundary setting is still difficult for me when it comes to desiring to please others. In each situation I look fearlessly at my motives and ask for guidance to make the best decision for myself.

My journey continues to take me to new places within myself where the light needs to shine, to reveal the darkness and to set myself free with God at the helm.

This is my intended course; I embrace it with abandon !


  1. I had no clue what a boundary was. I used walls to hide behind. I was so frightened of people and being hurt. Afraid that if you knew about the incest that you would blame me. Today I have healthy boundaries and I know how to say no as well as yes.

  2. I hadn't heard this word 'boundaries' until recent therapy. My homework is to read a book called Where to Draw the Line by Anne Katherine, M.A.
    I've had it for a few weeks and haven't cracked it open. I will today.

  3. Boundary-setting is learning self-worth. When I had very little, others could trespass on me and I didn't even take notice.

    As I am gaining more self-love and self-respect I am aware when someone is trespassing.

    The difficulty for me is how I correct the situation. Learning to stand up for myself and simultaneously treating the trespassor with respect is my ultimate goal.

    We are all walking together on this healing journey one little step at a time.